Once upon a time, in a pasture not too far away, a special bovine was born. As a calf, Moolah was just like all the other little ones on the farm, carefree and fun loving. As a full grown cow, she became known the world over for her generosity and her unique talents. You see, Moolah was special. She wasn’t just a regular dairy cow. Moolah was a Cash Cow, and not just any Cash Cow. She became the most famous Cash Cow in the world, the very first JRfm Cash Cow.
When Moolah was in her teens she began to realize she was different from all of the other dairy cows on the farm. She spent her days giving. She would wake in the morning and bring her siblings and cousins in the barn little treats and gifts to make their days begin happy. She would help care for the sick. She would visit with the elderly. She was the kindest cow any of the other animals had ever known and even the farmer noticed her giving nature.
Moolah started her family just like every other cow on the farm. She awaited the birth of her first calf with excitement and nerves, as every new mother does. When her daughter, Jewel, was born, though, something was very different. Instead of producing milk for Jewel, Moolah was producing cold, hard CASH! Jewel was hungry and the farmer didn’t know what to think… except Ka-Ching!!
Of course, the farmer found a way to keep Jewel fed and she grew up as Moolah’s treasured, only child. Moolah began a career as the JRfm Cash Cow shortly after Jewel was born and became the oldest, most well respected and generous Cash Cow ever. Moolah gave away hundreds of thousands of dollars to JRfm listeners over 20 years.
As the first Cow Mother to ever work outside of the barn, though, she often felt guilty when she was absent from her precious daughters life. Jewel was well cared for and loved, but a Mothers guilt is powerful. Moolah tried to make up for her absences with gifts and extravagant vacations. Jewel was given everything she ever wanted and was rarely reprimanded for indulgent behaviour. Jewel grew to be a lovely young cow, possessing the same gifts as her mother but lacking her incredibly generous nature.
Moolah retired as the JRfm Cash Cow in 2012, with her teets having dried up of all but an occasional penny. Over the last 4 years, Moolah has been coaching Jewel on the way of the Cash Cow, dreaming of the day she will take over the family business and become the next JRfm Cash Cow. That day has arrived.
Jewel has her mothers special talent for producing cold, hard cash instead of cold, fresh milk but she’s a little moo-dy and hasn’t quite warmed up to the idea of working for a living. Some might say that she’s a typical moo-llenial. She doesn’t quite understand WHY she should be giving away all of her precious cash so she can sometimes be a little… disruptive, at milking times. We at JRfm have watched her grow into the cow that she is now, though, and we think she’s still got the potential to be a great Cash Cow. Her generosity of spirit may wane from time to time, but ultimately, we believe she could end up being the greatest Cash Cow of all time.